Children often do what their parents consider the wrong things. This isn’t because they don’t know what is correct. It’s because humans are predisposed to follow our impulses and do what we want to. This is a natural instinct that requires guidance to control.
This blog from Boymom Designs will highlight three strategies that you can use to motivate your kids to WANT to do the right thing.
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Connect With Your Kids
When children don't follow your lead or rules, it’s often because they feel disconnected and are trying to get your attention. We often forget that our kids can feel disconnected from us for simple things like us working long hours, being home but being busy with chores and other things, or even just not giving them as much attention as they need.
Sometimes it’s best to turn off your cell phone, disconnect from work for a bit and ignore the messy house. Spend some time just playing with your kids and listen to what’s going on in their lives. Be present with them and give them a chance to enjoy the fun side of mom and dad.
The more you connect with your kids on their level, the more likely they are to model your behavior. When this happens, they will choose to follow your lead instead of simply doing what they’re told. You will be surprised at how much this helps them to make the right decisions.
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Offer Support
Always encourage your children whether they are being good or bad. Positive reinforcement is shown to positively influence bad behavior. When you encourage your kids’ good behavior, they are more likely to exhibit them again. For bad behavior, support and encouragement in the form of telling them what they’ve done wrong and how they can do better, can go a long way in influencing them to change.
It takes about 21 days to create a new habit and if you get in the habit of offering support and encouragement, even when your child does something wrong, you will notice a remarkable change in their behavior. Remember, these little ones love praise, so they will do more good things to get the praise they love.
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Teach Them How To Handle Their Emotions
When kids act out even though they know better, this can also be a sign that they have big emotions bottled up in their tiny bodies with no idea how to express themselves. You can help your kids to understand and express their emotions by having conversations with them about different feelings and what they mean. You can also teach them how to safely express anger and pain by allowing them to do different activities that will help them to release these emotions.
When your children understand their emotions, they will express and control them better. This will reduce actions triggered by impulses and encourage them to think about their actions and do the right thing.
Does this mean more work for you?
Absolutely, but does your work ever stop as a parent? Children are not robots, they will never just do as they are told whenever you want them to. It is best to encourage good behavior over time and this will eventually come naturally to your children. Continue to motivate them and provide the guidance they need. Your little ones will make you proud.
